My Toast at Iris' Wedding Reception

For those of you who missed it or want to relive the magic of my toast, here it is! If you were at the reception, you'll notice that I forgot to say the opening joke, a mistake that I am still grieving over, as it would have elevated my toast from simply awesome to legendary. I actually wrote my toast around the first and the last lines, which were the two lines that I really wanted to say, hoping to be able to honestly say "It'll make you laugh, it'll make you cry". This would have been more true if I included my opening joke, but whatever! What's done is done. And it's not really that important in relation to all the more sentimental stuff about Iris and James anyways! Enjoy.

[I also want to say that I appreciate all the encouraging comments about my toast. I'm glad that I was able to say what I wanted to say and express it in such a way that it connected with you all! ...And I think the mic cut out momentarily at points where it seemed like I paused because I was choking up...at the same time that dust got into my eye. Weird.]

I would first just like to thank you all for coming out and celebrating with us. This is easily the biggest early birthday party I've ever had.

[ Introduce Family ] 

...And with that, most of my allotted 3 minutes is up. But it's okay. I only have a few things I want to say.

I've been asked a lot, "How does it feel to have your little sister engaged?" And while it did take me a little bit of time to get comfortable to the idea that my little sister was getting married, I'm so happy to be standing here today speaking at James and Iris' wedding reception. And using a few true stories, I'm going to try to explain why.

As a big brother, if I had to describe Iris with just one word, it would be gentle and kind and tender-hearted. I'm not sure how many of you know this side of her because she can tend to be more headstrong and uptight in leadership and ministry positions, as Wendy displayed at graduation banquet. But Iris has always been very gentle and kind. Growing up, whenever there was any sort of argument in the house, whether between me and my parents or my parents between themselves, she would go up to her room and pray for us. And my mom likes to say that she usually didn't have to spank Iris when she was bad, because all she needed to do was look at Iris sternly and she would start crying...while I usually got extra spanks for trying to squirm my way out of getting hit. Finally, back when we were kids at our old church building, I would skip the refreshments after church to go play soccer with my friends. Every week, Iris would go and get food, put it on a plate, and bring it all the way down to the dirt patch we were playing on for me to eat.

And it's for this gentle, sweet girl that I as a big brother want someone who can take care of Iris and love her, and I'm so glad that James is that man who Iris will now begin to fatten up. 

If I had to describe James with one word, it would be "strong." This was actually my very first impression of him, when we played pickup basketball together in the CCRB his freshman year. As an aside, I believe that I was actually friends with James before Iris was, but I've never confirmed this suspicion. Anyways, James was the one guy that when I tried fouling him to prevent him from getting an easy layup, he would still manage to get the ball up and into the hoop. As I've gotten to know James these last few years, I've found that he is not only strong physically, but also mentally and spiritually.

As a big brother, it's for all of these reasons that I'm so glad that James can be the rock for my little sister for the rest of their lives. It is somewhat like the Biblical picture of the strong lion lying down with the gentle lamb...only that I hope that hasn't happened yet... 

As alluded to previously, it did take me a little bit of time to get comfortable with the idea that Iris was getting married. This was for a lot of the expected reason, but the biggest reason was this - it took me time to come to terms with the fact that there was going to be another man who loves and adores Iris more than I do (except my dad, but he doesn't count).

But James, I want you to know that I'm so glad that that man is you, and I know that you will love and adore Iris in a greater capacity than I ever could and will love her for the rest of your life. 

And Iris, I just want you to know that I'm so glad that you found James to love you for the rest of your life, but there will be no one who will ever love you as a big brother more than I do.

So if you would, join me in raising a glass for James and Iris! Cheers!

Thanks for the great photo, Abben!

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