My Lack of Suffering

As we all know, suffering permanently changes a person. With regards to Christianity, we hear stories of how people have come to faith because of suffering and how people have grown closer to God because of suffering, but also stories of people turning away from Jesus because of their suffering. Suffering has the ability to separate genuine faith from phony faith, and even the power to strengthen formerly phony faith into genuine faith. Suffering can make or break a person and their faith.

Here are some nice quotes and passages about suffering that I reference in my post. Read them because they are gooood.

"People who have never suffered in life have less empathy for others, little knowledge of their own shortcomings and limitations, no endurance in the face of hardship, and unrealistic expectations for life. As the New Testament book of Hebrews tells us, anyone God loves experiences hardship (Hebrews 12:1-8)." - Tim Keller

"You don't realize Jesus is all you need until Jesus is all you have." - Tim Keller

Bible passages (linked, so the length of this post doesn't explode):
Ecclesiastes 11:7-12:8
The Beatitudes

I have never suffered before, and it bothers me that I haven't.
Elaboration ahead.

I have never suffered before.

I have never suffered deeply before. I've experienced my share of hardships, just like the next guy, but I don't think I've ever experienced deep sorrow before. I've gotten bad grades before, been betrayed by friends, gotten rejected by girls, and argued with my parents, but that's about it. I've never suffered any meaningful physical ailments, the death of close friends, or abuse from my parents. I've never been cheated on, rejected by society, or extremely taken advantage of. I can't say I'm radically oppressed, underprivileged, or broken. I've never faced deep anger with God, deep sorrow from losses, deep hurt resulting from sin, or deep pain from the flesh. I've never fully experienced the "You don't realize Jesus is al you need until Jesus is all you have" quote, because even though I hate to say it, I've always had more than Jesus. God has been gracious and has always provided me with prosperity, comfort, and potential. All in all, my relationship with God is very much like my relationship with my parents (as most of you know is pretty great) - strained at times, but for the most part, great and without conflict.

Although it may seem that my life really has been a walk in the park, God's grace in my life really can't be understated. Though my problems are relatively insignificant, God has prepared me for everything life has thrown my way, helping me avoid pain that is deeper than it could be. It is when I am closest to God that crap is thrown my way, and my strong relationship with God at the times of these hardships have really mitigated their negative impact in my life and have helped me grow as a person. God has braced me from all the storms that arise in my life, and for that I am extremely grateful. [If you want to know more about this, ask me about my adventure with women in college.]

Question for the reader: do you consider yourself as someone who has suffered before? I know there's probably no one that really reads this thing besides young people (except for Shawn…that guy is ancient). Despite your age, a lot of you have gone through a lot of family issues and have lost loved ones and have suffered deep physical ailments and all the other stuff that I say I haven't experienced. But I still don't know if you guys consider yourselves people that have suffered. Shoot me an email sometime or IM me (or comment, if you want to). Let's talk about it!

It bothers me that I haven't suffered.

A fear and anticipation of suffering.

If you skipped the Ecclesiastes passage I posted, go back and read it. To paraphrase, Solomon is saying that suffering is inevitable, and you better build a relationship with God before the sh** hits the fan.

I'm not going to lie, I'm not looking forward to the many "days of darkness" that are going to come, when "the sun and the light and the moon and the stars grow dark, and the clouds return after the rain." It's not really a surprise that it seems like all older folk have gone through deep suffering, whereas us younguns continue to frolic in the bliss of ignorance. I know these dark days are going to come, but I wish they wouldn't…at least not yet. This knowledge of suffering has me in anticipation, waiting for the problems to hit me so I can just get it all over with and be done with the dark days and be closer to Jesus and more empathetic and all those other things that Tim Keller says. I know this mindset is foolish and that suffering will come when it chooses to do so, but not knowing when the suffering is going to come can be maddening.

I've heard somewhere that God takes away the things that we hold onto most dearly (or as Tim Keller might say, the things we idolize) to force us to center our lives around Him. It's no coincidence that I'm supremely fearful of God taking away the things I value most, like reputation and good grades and a stable life. I've asked myself many times if I can still be faithful if He chooses to do so, but I can never know until it happens. But I don't want it to happen. Even though I may come out on top and have a more amazing relationship with God, I still don't want to pay the price for it.

A barrier in ministry

As Tim Keller says, not having gone through suffering keeps me from deeply empathizing with others, a necessary component of effective ministry. In many of the conversations I've had these past years, I've wanted to be able to say "I've been through the same thing" or "I know how you feel", but couldn't. I want to be able to model Jesus, who went through every trial and temptation so that he could intercede on our behalf. I want to truly understand the problems of others and understand their crises of faith. Not having gone through the refining fire of suffering also reduces the credibility of my faith, as people who have suffered more than I can accuse me faith of immaturity, saying "You may believe this now, but you've never gone through…" or "You have no idea what real life is like.".

I wish I've suffered more in my life to able to improve my witness, but as I previously said, I'm unwilling to go through the pain of suffering. Yeah, I know. I'm retarded.

My response

Remember my Creator

The call of the Teacher in Ecclesiastes is to remember our Creator. I'm not 100% sure what is meant, but I'm pretty sure that it is along the lines of knowing God more and more deeply, that when the dark days come, we can be sure of who God is.

Give more.

I've been blessed with a stable life and a loving family, and I need to use the things that God has given me for his glory. We all know that here in America, our wealth far exceeds that of most of the world, and it is our calling to share with those that have less than us. Similarly, I need to make the most of not being plagued by suffering to share love with others, especially to those that are struggling. This isn't some "holier than thou" sort of mindset, but one of giving back to the one who gave it all to me. I'm not exactly sure what this looks like, but hopefully I can figure some things out given some time.

Seek suffering for the Gospel

Luke 14:26-27 - “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple. And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple."

We've all heard that it is impossible to be a disciple without suffering and sacrifice, but I think we all shy away from discomfort and true sacrifice. I remember hearing at Urbana: "Offering isn't sacrifice until it hurts." I need to give until it hurts. I need to embrace hurting for God. I need to be okay with losing sleep for the sake of the kingdom. I need to be okay with talking to people I don't want to, and loving people who I hate. I need to be willing to pray my butt off and fast my stomach off. I need to engage people about God, even when it is awkward.

God calls us farther out than the brink of our comfort zone. He calls us to suffering for the gospel, and I need to answer this call.

2 Timothy 1:8 - "So do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord or of me his prisoner. Rather, join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God."