Lessons from a Memorial Service

A few Saturdays ago, Iris and I went to our family friends' memorial service. Grandpa Huang, or Huang "Bobo", was the grandfather of two of our childhood friends, and our parents wanted Iris and I to go to the memorial service to represent the family. This was the first memorial service I've been to that I can remember post-puberty, and even though I really didn't know the deceased very well personally, I found myself deeply moved throughout the service. God's presence was unmistakably in the chapel of Ann Arbor Christian Church, and He ministered in profound ways all throughout the two hour memorial service. The service itself wasn't really anything special or surprising (at least I don't think so...I really can't remember). We started with a time of silent reflection and prayer, followed by worship songs, a message by the pastor, a couple of eulogies, final respects to the deceased and the family, and finally a couple more worship songs to close the service. The following are some of the things that God showed me anew during the service.

The Centrality of Worship

One of the things that surprised me the most about the service was the amount of singing that happened. The congregation sang a few songs corporately, but the Evergreen Fellowship (the older folk) and the grandchildren of the deceased also sang worship songs during the service. These songs were all worship songs, praising God and worshiping Him for he is. In other words, the songs were all directed at God, not the deceased! This was one of the many signs that while the service was intended to remember and honor Grandpa Huang, the real focus of the entire service was to glorify God and to thank Him for the blessings which he bestowed upon Grandpa Huang and his family. It's hard to explain how special it was seeing everyone praise God and thank him in spite of the obvious pain they were experience. How strange must it be that Christians can sing "How Great Thou Art" and "Amazing Grace" in such difficult times of sorrow and suffering! The entire service embodied the message the Diane Telian gave last Friday at large group about how we need to worship God at all times in all circumstances.

The Power of the Word

On a more personal note, I understood a little more deeply the power of God's Word, and how it really is "living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit". I'm not much of a crier, and given that I'm not a very empathetic person by nature and I wasn't close to the deceased, there wasn't much in the service that really made me even want to cry...except for the Scripture read. It really was the weirdest thing - basically every time I heard Scripture read, quoted, or sung, I felt the tug inside my heart and quite often had my eyes well up. This is one of the few times that I've really felt the Word of God really pierce my heart. I originally wasn't sure if bringing a Bible was common protocol in memorial services, but I was glad I brought it, as I felt God drawing me to the Word multiple times through the service. Scripture came alive to me, filling me as God drew my from passage to passage, speaking to me in new and unexpected ways. Praise God for the living, active, and sharp Word of God has the ability to penetrate even the coldest, most unsympathetic, most callous, most prideful, and most emotionless of hearts as mine.

Our Hope in Christ

All the worship that took place was enabled by a deep belief in God's salvation from death and in the reality of the coming kingdom that God is bringing. There was an apparent underlying confidence that not only was Huang Bobo with God, that we would all see him again face to face. There was a very strange mix of sorrow and joy in the room. As Christians, we always talk about how important it is to look to the future and the coming kingdom and to keep our eyes on the prize, but it wasn't until this memorial service that I experienced the actual necessity of focusing on the coming kingdom. Without knowing in my head and believing in my heart that there is indeed infinitely rich, joyful, rich, and everlasting life after death, I don't know if I would have been able to make it through the service.

All this looking forward is of course preceded by the looking back towards the amazing victory Christ won on the cross. Without Christ's sacrifice for us, there would be no forgiveness of sins or everlasting life. I experienced that deep, true, genuine gratitude for Christ's sacrifice and salvation for the first time in a while. In a sense, we often lose sight of the greatness of God's promise in the little frustrations of life.

Below are some of the familiar passages that moved me in new ways at the memorial service:

Isaiah 25:8 -
"He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces, and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the Lord has spoken." 

1 Corinthians 15:54-57 -
"When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written: "Death is swallowed up in victory." "O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?" The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ."

The Urgency of the Mission

As mentioned before, the memorial service was a strange combination of sorrow and joy because of the hope of eternal life for Grandpa Huang. But what if he didn't know God? What if he hadn't accepted Christ to be his lord and savior? Hell is real, and I can't imagine the depth of sorrow that I would experience if I was at a memorial service and the deceased didn't know Christ. Would there be any hope? Wouldn't it be futile to talk about the good deeds of the deceased if we know that he never received the righteousness of Christ? What if it was the guy that I sat next to in class every day but never took the time to get to know? What if it was the girl that came to our small groups and large groups every week but never committed her life to Christ, and I never took the time to actually share the gospel with her? It wasn't until I came face to face with the reality of physical death that I remembered the consequences of eternal death. We lively young people often forget the reality of death, and in forgetting the reality of death, we forget the urgency of the mission.

The memorial service was a big wake-up call for me. We are called to be God's ambassadors into the world, to be those that God uses to bring life to those whom God has chosen. The world is radically broken, and God has chosen us to bring healing to all the ends of the earth. I need to feel that sense of urgency. I need to have the same passion for the lost as God does. I can't sit around being disobedient to the call of God, feeling entitled to some sort of God's work. I need to obey. I need to have a passion for the lost. I need to feel that anguish that God feels when he sees the brokenness of the world.

Romans 10:14-15 - "How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching? And how are they to preach unless they are sent? As it is written, 'How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the good news!'"

[Thanks Tiffany Pan for sharing this video earlier this year!]